What's your story?

So, there I was... my husband and I had just watched a documentary called Religulous by Bill Maher. It was a very good documentary and though my husband and I have discussed religion and spirituality many times, it inspired a good debate!

Then, suddenly, out of nowhere, a nasty case of misunderstanding appeared! Our faces contorted with irritation and defensiveness as the pissed-off silence put an end to our lively debate.

No longer was the topic relevant, but rather, as eyes squinted and lips pursed, and oddly, somewhere in the background the old western showdown theme song could be heard faintly, our egos stood back to back, poised to take 20 paces and draw our Motives loaded with Perspectives and Interpretations!

It was mighty eerie...

Realizing that it was an innocent misunderstanding that caused the whole mess, I lay down my weapons and offered Understanding, Acceptance and Reassurance to bandage my husbands pride.

Being able to create Peaceful Resolution released my mind from festering on the conflict. Which made it possible for me to learn alot from the experience.



1. Humans learn best from and are more motivated by stories. This isn't a new discovery! This is actually quite ancient knowledge! Look at how influential the Bible is! And how every great speech will have a story in it to give the main message relevance to the audience. Sharing stories is how we connect and better understand each other.



2. A bitter-sweet part of this process are the influence of the Perspectives, Interpretations and Motives of the speaker and the listener! With everyone looking at the world through their own shade of reality, things can get pretty blurry! Which is why we find ourselves engaging in so much conflict among humanity.



What can help clear things up a bit?

1. Slow Down! Take the time to engage in a dialogue in your own head where you ask yourself what your motives are and what can you do to contribute to a positive outcome.
This doesn't mean you have to forfeit your opinions to appease others... in fact, I hope no one does that! It simply means, if you find yourself engaged in a conflict, ask yourself if you're arguing to win or to simply exchange ideas. Arguing to win gets brutal and can go on and on! Arguing to exchange or defend your ideas is more of an offering of information, then let it go. People can take it or leave it and they are responsible for their interpretation! If they need further information they can ask! Communication shouldn't be like a hockey game folks!

2. Step outside your ego once in a while and try to see things from someone else's perspective. Though the chances of you seeing things the same as someone else are not very good, at least you can get a feel for their point of view. You might even find different views to be a refreshing change of scenery!

Even though these suggestions are simple, it's difficult to disengage from deeply ingrained patterns of behavior. Let's face it, we're Human and that means we're not perfect! We are still in the adolescence of our social development. Our voices are still cracking, social pores still clogging and occasionally spewing pus, our brains are still dealing with evolution as we adjust to environmental conditions and fill our bodies with chemicals and rewire ourselves neurologically based on the dominant technologies! So let's have more compassion for ourselves and each other as we change! It's ok to make mistakes along the way, in fact that's another way we learn!

So as you go about your day, remember, you're telling the world Your Story and writing it in the memories of those you interact with. It's a good idea to think about how you want to tell Your Story and how you want it to be remembered!